keeping my hand in it

Most nights these past weeks have been spent in the gallery filming with Ethan. Quick 5 minute drawing that is a result of down time and the time it takes for him to change the film in the camera. It feels good to be making things. Also came up with some ideas for next week while I am at Azule. I will try to post often as I always enjoyed using this as a project and "in progress" blog as opposed to finalized ideas and works. HAVING A GOOD TIME, HAVING A GOOD TIME.

Time lost.

So much time passes between updates. Sometimes I wonder what I am doing at all. All of the things that I have to do everyday feel so unimportant sometimes compared to what I need to do to be okay. My job, my apartment, my entire life full of appointments and bill payments... I thought I was working toward getting more time to create. Instead I find myself stretched too thin, any creative energy I have is sucked out of me on problem solving at work. I come home uninspired and mad at myself. Lately I have been taking pictures. I am constantly doing this. It has been almost a year now where I document my life almost obsessively. And it isn't anything important, it just is. When I feel like I'm losing time and I can't slow down and take in my environment, I find myself documenting it. You are here. You moved this over here. Now you are doing this. It is something to be doing. Expect real updates in the future. I am trying, really I am.

After an intermission...

A Portrait of Who I think I am Based on Who I Know I'm Not

2011, gesso, graphite & pastel on paper

This has been my week off from work. While I am quickly adjusting to full time work life, it has been difficult to actually make anything. Any time I work on something I end up scrapping it, that is if I end up working on anything at all. And then today I actually had time to pick up paper and some drawing materials. This is just a detail (the full drawing is 30 x 44) and it is off to an okay start. Cruisin' for a bruisin' I'd say.

That is all for now.

Here I am

Best Minds

A Day Without Sound , charcoal on paper

Last Sunday was BEST MINDS at Sara's apartment (you can read about it on her blog: here)

and I made this piece- a drawing?!

It felt really good and organic to draw again. I have been having so much difficulty communicating lately. All day at work I am counting seconds and making tally marks and prompting non-verbal children to form approximations of words. By the time I get home I am completely incapable of conversation. And it has been so difficult to even think about creating, let alone MAKING SOMETHING. Best Minds was the perfect push that I needed. I really love that Sara got so many good people together to talk and share and listen.

Video of performance

From March 2010. With Sara Santarsiero.

With the arrival of a new bed, a new idea has arrived as well.

Every day, I will open Webster's New World Dictionary For Young Readers and select word at random. Then Grant and I will separately record a response to this word. About once a month we will share these entries with each other and post the more wonderful ones to a blog dedicated to the project.

Keep your eyes peeled.